FIXATION Page 9
I was cold. The hardwood floors that my room had were cold. Ross had asked if I wanted to put a carpet in here. He told me to decorate it any way I wanted but I didn't feel worthy of making any nice changes to a house that wasn't mine and will never be. I just laid on the cold floor and let the coldness numb my pain and hopefully allow me to fall asleep.
ROSS POV
"That little shit!" Rhino spat.
"Watch how you speak about Eden Rhino"
"Sorry, boss but look at what she did I had to drag that woman out. Pay her all I had in my pocket to keep her from going to the police. Rock you owe me!"
Rhino said angrily.
"At least she did her part. Rock when you see her again. Send her back to Europe. I don't want her anywhere around threatening Eden or scaring her. I won't have that".
"Ross pardon me for saying this but why do you defend her so much when she clearly doesn't appreciate all you do for her?" Rock asked.
I didn't know the answer to that.
"Because that's not the Eden I know, but she's in there and I hope she shows up again someday. I can only hope" I said to calm them down.
But the truth of the matter was much more deeper than that, but I couldn't tell my guys the truth.
That, I love her.
Chapter 16.
Ross POV
Of all the things that I had problems admitting to myself and to anyone else was that I loved Eden. All my life I felt a sense of loneliness even though I was surrounded by people constantly. I took over the business at a very young age and my dad's men became my companions and eventually, they became my brothers. Rock and I grew up together and we were about the same age.
But that day when I saved Eden and saw her beautiful terrified eyes I knew then and there that I had to protect her forever. She needed me. There she was a shy timid scared girl who barely spoke English. I taught her all she knows. We were inseparable and she wasn't 'one of the guys' like many girls that hang around guys are. No, Eden wasn't that type. She wasn't like that. She was around but she always kept things light and formal. Never flirting with any of my men. Never saying jokes that we're inappropriate. She always kept things simple and everyone liked her being around. She was fun in a classy way if that makes sense. She didn't get involved in anything and only spoke if she felt like she could. She knew the difference between business meetings and pleasure meetings that consisted of heavy drinking, drugs and wild parties. But she never really participated in those. She was around for me and stood by my side. But she never did drugs or partied too hard that she didn't remember who she went to bed with. She was a virgin after all.
But lately she was changing, and I had no idea why.
But when I stood outside her door and heard her crying so hard. I couldn't take it but to go in. The door was locked. If I knock, she wasn't going to open. Normally I would just let her sleep and not bother her, but she wasn't sleeping. She was bloody crying and clearly very upset.
I went downstairs and got the key to her room from Carol and opened her door.
She was laying on the floor with her legs bend to her chest and her long hair down like a cascade on the floor. It was so long I had to make sure I didn't step on it.
"Eden." I went to hold her, and she was trembling. She was freezing cold. Her shoulders, her arms, her face. She didn't stop crying. I picked her up and put her on her bed and put the blankets on top of her.
"Leave me in the floor Ross is where I deserve to be" she said faintly. I thought she was sleeping or half asleep, but she was neither. Her teared filled eyes we're opened.
"You'll get warm soon love," I told her. I didn't dare touch her for fear she would get scared. I sat there waiting for her to go to sleep. After about twenty minutes she was asleep. She didn't snore but I saw her breathing ease up. She was no longer trembling.
I sent a text to everyone instructing them not to bother me. I was with her this was our time. I had to find out from her and no one else how I can make the wrong right.
She slept for about 2 hours before she started to wake up. I told Carol to bring her tomato soup. Her favorite. When she woke up, she smiled upon seeing the soup.
I placed it on her lap slowly.
I waited for her to adjust herself in a sitting position where she was comfortable. Before I talked to her. She just stared at the soup.
"Want to tell me what's going on with you Eden?" I really had very little patience. And lately, Eden responded to me in a rude way and I didn't like it. So, I pray that she wouldn't say something to piss me off. I didn't want to upset her more than she was already.
She didn't take a bite of her soup.
"Eat please" I begged her.
"For what Ross? I'm just a waste"
"What the f...." Where was this coming from?
"Eden, don't talk like that," I told her.
"Ross is true! If it wasn't for you and your house and your clothes, food, the money you name it I would be out on the streets as a beggar. With nothing. My family abandoned me because they did even though I'm of age it doesn't matter. In Spain, kids stay with their families until we'll after their forties"
Tears running down her cheeks. She placed her plate next to her on the bed and placed her knees close to her chest and began crying loudly.
I had no idea what to do. How to comfort her.
"I have nothing..." She continued.
"I can't get a job. I can't go to school because I can't afford it and my parents didn't set up a college fund for me. I can't even get a freaking scholarship. I hit someone. I don't have anything Ross"
"That's not true Eden you have me" I tried to calm her down but that seemed to only make it worse.
"And for how long Ross? When you tire of me or when you marry Monique someday or I don't know decide to just leave everything and everyone behind and move to the big cities because you can then what? No Ross none of it is mine and it will never be mine. This bed, this roof, this room is all yours! I'm just a homeless person that you are allowing to stay at your house for who knows what reasons"
I stayed quiet for a while. I had no idea she felt that way. All the stuff I did. All the stuff I sabotaged for her. Her family, her job offers she never got them because I hacked into her email and permanently deleted them before she could open them. All her phone calls were directed to me first. Yes, I was obsessed no, I was fixated, and it put her like this. I was the reason why she was suffering.
"Please Ross, you don't know what it feels like to get up in the morning and repeat the same routine over and over again. I'll be nineteen in less than a month and what do I have? What do I do? While everyone else is working or going to school what am I doing with my life and with my time?"
She stopped for a little bit. Then she continued and I just sat there listening and taking it all in.
"Please, just leave me alone Ross. I'm sorry this is your house and I shouldn't be telling you what to do but please just give me this, please go."
She cried again some more. She would despise me if she knew I was the real reason for all of her bad luck. I had done it. The worse part was that I didn't regret it. She was here. Miserable, vulnerable, sad and depressed but she was here with me and that's all that mattered to me at this moment. At this time. That is all I care about.
"Okay," I said, and I got up and left her room. I went into my room and sat on my bed. I really didn't know what to say to her to make her feel better. I could give her a job working with me or for me, but she wouldn't agree with what I did. I could put her to work with Carol and pay her, but she wouldn't take my money because she says she lives here and the least she can do is clean. I didn't want her to feel like a maid. This was her house. But she didn't see it that way.
"Beep beep" a text. Probably Monique. I forgot we had plans tonight. I was supposed to hang out with her dad and play some poker. But I wasn't in the mood to hang out with her tonight. She mostly just did everything I asked. I felt bad for Eden and I would feel more of a jerk if I just
left her here alone. She would hate me more than she already did. I had no idea when she changed or what caused her to change but she did. I checked my phone and it wasn't Monique. It was Carl the friend and contact I have in the police.
"Hey, Ross I can't hold Earl here much longer. He completed his time for stealing your boat. Since you didn't press charges on the girl is like he's off the hook as well"
Oh damn! I forgot about Earl. Jail is where he belonged after trying to help Eden escape me. I didn't want him here, but he knew too much information. He couldn't talk because I made sure of that. But still, it wasn't safe leaving him out there. But why should I give a damn?
"I'm on my way to get him"
I could have sent Rock or any of my guys to pick him up and dispose of him, but I wanted to know myself why he went against me to help Eden. I was his commander and he knows how much Eden means to me. She's not my prisoner she's just my...I didn't know.
I got to the police station and went in. He was in a chair all beat up and hurt. The guys really did a number on him.
"Let's go," I said with a serious straight face. I gave a nod to Carl and headed out with Earl behind me.
As I drove on, I wanted to punch him and make his face worse than it already was. But he wasn't worth it. I had no idea what to do with him. After a while driving trying to figure it out, I had to get back to Eden. She was sleeping when I left. That was two hours ago. I had to get rid of Earl. I had to call some of my guys, but I had turned the phone off because Monique kept pestering me. I completely stood her up and I didn't give a damn. I finally drove to hells land where some of my guys we're but not Rock or Rhino, not my main ones.
I pulled in and told Earl to get out. He did and we walked to the house. I didn't want blood on my floor, so I decided to take him outside in the private area and finish him there. "Screw it" I turned my phone back on and there were 50 text messages from Monique. I ignored them all and called Rock.
There was one text message from Eden.
"Thank you for listening to me. I'm sorry I've been such a pain lately. I haven't stopped to say thank you for all you have done for me. Speaking of which please take Earl out of jail. I'm the one who took the boat is not fair that he pays for my mistake. He's a good friend"
I stopped in my tracks. Is like she knew I was up to no good and she wanted to stop me.
I pushed Earl and locked him in an outdoor shed. Rock and Rhino and Jack got here finally.
"How do we end him, boss?" They were always up for blood and didn't care about anything.
"We don't" I said. They all looked at me in shock.
"Boss" Jack went to say
"Eden has asked me to get him out of jail and that means she doesn't want him hurt for some reason. I just...I can't hurt her more than I have by taking away everyone she cares about"
"Ross, she doesn't care about Earl she barely knows the bastard," Rock said.
"I know but she knows him, and she will be asking where he is and I just...I can't lie to her"
"We can do it boss," Rhino said.
"No, he stays alive. But not in my camp take him somewhere else anywhere you want but don't hurt him"
I said and left.
The drive home was long and cold and all I kept thinking about was Eden. Without her knowing about it she had saved Earl's life. She was truly a wonderful person who didn't deserve to suffer the way she was. I just didn't know how to help her. The only way to help her was to
Marry her.
Chapter 17.
Ross POV
Marrying her would have her feeling secure. All of my things will be hers. It was a huge price to pay for sure but what was it really compare to everything I put her through and everything I did to her. She didn't know about any of it, but I did.
I was the reason why she felt the way she did. I owed it to her. It wouldn't change anything. I would still be with Monique and any other girl I wanted. But at least this way, Eden will feel like my equal. It was the only way. I went to my room and for the very first time I passed out alone in my own bed.
**THE NEXT DAY**
EDEN POV
I slept as if I hadn't slept good in 18 years. My birthday was approaching although I doubt anyone would remember. I talked to my parents every so often but every time I did, I just felt worse. Them being so far away. Leaving me here. It is like they didn't care.
I heard a knock on the door.
"Come in," I said.
"Good morning sunshine" Carol always trying to bring a smile to my face.
"Since you didn't eat last night at all I thought I start out your morning with something big and tasty"
Bacon, chocolate chip waffles, two pieces of toast with butter and strawberry jam and a blueberry muffin with a fruit cup and a glass of orange juice. This breakfast seemed like it could be for four people.
"Wow!" I said.
"I know. Ross wanted to make sure you are well fed since you didn't eat last night anything."
"Well, thank you, is much appreciated. Where is Ross?" I asked while taking a bite from my toast.
"Oh, he left already you know how he is always on the run. But he did check up on you all night he was very worried about you sweetie"
Ross worried about me. Sure, he was.
"I doubt it but is a nice thought. I'm taking a shower and getting dressed can you please ask the driver to be ready in about 30 minutes or so?"
"Sure, where are you going may I ask?"
"To look for work. Anywhere really"
I said getting up.
"Okay, I will tell one of the boys to take you Ross has them there for a reason"
"Well, I doubt that reason is me," I said smiling as I walked in the bathroom. My bathroom was very large and opened. I was very lucky and fortunate that I lived this way. Ross took good care of me. But why? I wasn't doing anything for him. I wasn't family. Just a lost little girl in a world too big for her. I needed a job. I was obviously doing something wrong. Maybe I needed to sharpen up my interviewing methods because whatever I was doing it wasn't working.
I went to take a shower. When I got out, I put on my white long pants with a black belt and a yellow summer shirt with short sleeves. I teamed it with white wedges sandals. The perfect outfit for a job search.
I put my long hair up in a ponytail put on very little make-up and my long drop sleek chain earrings grabbed my purse and headed out.
I didn't touch my breakfast except for a few bites of toast. I wasn't hungry at all. I had one mission and that was to find a job and I was going to come back today with one or my name isn't Eden Elena Alicante.
One of Ross's men was waiting there for me. I've never seen this one before. He was older and more polite than the other younger ones.
"Hello, my lady. My name is George I’ll be your driver for today"
"Hello, are you new here?" I asked.
"Yes and no. I've known Ross since he was a young lad. I'm originally from England. But I moved here when I was about twenty. Met Ross's dad and we have been friends ever since."
"Oh, that's nice," I said. I never really met Ross's dad before. I've seen his mom a couple of times when we were younger. But never his dad. He was always outrunning the family "business" when Ross took over his parents moved away to Melbourne and they barely visit. Ross usually goes to see them every once in a while, very rarely though and he never asks me to go with him. I don't know why. I would love to meet them but maybe one day.
I got to the shopping center and went inside. George said he would wait for me out there. I figured the shopping center was the best place to start. I mean anyone can be a cashier it didn't take much to learn that. The shopping center had many restaurants also. Which I would apply to as well. Not as a cook or chef because for that I was sure you needed to have more experience and I had none. My cooking dreams were somewhat over after that upset with the scholarship.
I was pacing around asking if they had open interviews and a couple of places did. I did the interview
but none of them offered me a job on the spot because they had other applicants they had to consider as well. Typical. I walked around some more when I saw him.
At a jewelry store. Holding a huge diamond ring an engagement ring. He was going to propose to Monique!
Ross was going to marry her and bring her to live at the mansion! I couldn't breathe. I felt as if the air had left my brain and I was entering a state of shock. I knew he was serious about her but not like this. My heart started beating rapidly. I closed my eyes for a second hoping it was all a dream or a vision. "It wasn't real". I kept telling myself. But it was. I opened my eyes again and he was holding the largest diamond ring there. But when he said " I'll take it" my entire world split in two. I ran out of there as fast as I could.
I ran to the opposite direction that George my driver was going. I kept running. I got near the intersection and went to a street full of houses. I ran and ran and ran. I didn't stop I didn't look back. He was going to marry that bitch! And bring her to live with us! I couldn't deal with that.
She was a horrible person. If she was good, I wouldn't care so much. Yes, I would! I had this crazy thought that maybe by making myself more of a challenge for Ross that he would see me and respect me more. That he wouldn't see me as a little girl. But I was. That was all I was to him. A little helpless girl with nothing or no one and that's what hurts the most honestly. Who was I kidding! also the fact that he was marrying someone else? That he was getting married at all. I just couldn't...I couldn't stand properly. I was a mess. It was a disaster. I ran some more. Thankfully I ended up by a playground and it was empty. I sat down in a swing and just thought about nothing but Ross and Monique getting married. Sharing a life together that could have been mine. I was a screw-up. I did everything wrong and now the ultimate price was paid. I would lose Ross forever.
ROSS POV
"You are kidding right?" Rock looked at me as if I told him I was becoming a priest or something. So did Rhino and all of my men.
"I'm serious and I hope you all start respecting Eden as my wife," I said firmly.